Whether you read research articles or cosmopolitan magazine, you will be familiar with the importance of spending time with your partner. Whether your relationship is new or established, flourishing or estranged, finding creative strategies to spend time together can be a challenge. Here are a few resources that can help you get inspired to engage in a regular date night ritual. Continue reading Resources for negotiating date night
The person who manages to create longer days will be stinking rich! Until then, we are all subject to the same rule: only 24 hours in a day. For many, the idea of filling 24 hours with productive activity is exhausting. Perhaps you are depressed. Perhaps you are self-employed, unemployed, (f)unemployed. Perhaps you are burnt out. Time scheduling is an easy tool giving you a handle to manage how and where you spend your energy. Continue reading Only 24 hours a day
Ken Sande and his team present a fabulous paradigm called “Relational Wisdom.” This post is dedicated to review this free resource. In particular, I would like to show you how you could benefit from this resource if you are not religiously minded.
Discover your personal values
Firstly, discover your personal values. The “God” section of the RW360 wheel refers to the guiding principles in your life. Perhaps you could try to identify your top five values from this values worksheet.
The amygdala hijack principle
I would also like to recommend that you explore his website and pay special attention to his teaching on the “amygdala hijack” principle. He explains the science behind why it is a good idea to slow down: think before you react. It holds many benefits to your relationships (not to mention minimizes the guilt and regret you feel after a rash word).
The value of soft skills
The relational wisdom equation is an apt way to describe the value of soft skills. Ken Sande describes that the value that a person contributes to the group is not the sum of his hard and soft skills. Rather it is a multiplication of effect.
- Person 1 has 7 hard skills and 2 soft skills
- Person 2 has 4 hard skills and 4 soft skills
If you had to count it together Person 1 has more skills than person 2:
- Person 1: 7 + 2 = 9
- Person 2: 4 + 4 = 8
But using the multiplication effect, you can see that Person 1 contributes less value to the group than Person 2:
- Person 1: 7 x 2 = 14
- Person 2: 4 x 4 = 16
Discover for yourself
Sign up for weekly Relational Wisdom (http://rw360.org/) blogs to learn the nuances of applying the RW360 principles in every day life. Or download the free self-study manual. The principles are extremely valuable for your interpersonal relationships whether you are religious or not.
Avoidance and unhelpful beliefs are the two primary factors that maintain fear. Thus the effective treatment for anxiety requires that a) you confront those beliefs and b) face those fears. Exposure therapy is a technique which challenges both aspects.
Firstly, let’s unpack how irrational beliefs contribute to the consequences. There are four main types of irrational (unhelpful) beliefs:
Demandingness: A rule about how the world should be
Catastrophizing: A prediction about how awful it would be if the rule was broken
Frustration intolerance: A belief about your inability to cope with it if the rule was broken
Global rating of self, others, or the world: Rating a unit as a whole based on a singular incident
I am sure you can imagine that a person who believes that
He (boss) should be fair and if he is not that is so awful I can’t stand it! If he is unfair, he is obviously a hateful bully
will experience feelings of anger, resentment, etc.