Monthly Archives: August 2016

Grief, demolition, and mending

DemolitionThe movie Demolition follows a man after the death of his wife. The only place where he feels comfortable to explore his grief is with the customer care service of a small vending machine company. In the company of her emotionally troubled son, they unpack (demolish) his life that seemed so “together” before his wife died. Uncomfortably real, it reminded me that there is no singular way to go through the grief process. The stepped approach is too simple to contain the extent of brokenness one experiences during these moments of crisis. Continue reading Grief, demolition, and mending

What helps people change?

Some days I wish that I was a fairy godmother (or had a fairy godmother) who could swish a magic wand and take all the problems and suffering away. That would be so much easier than needing to undertake a process of personal change! If you have ever tried helping somebody going though a hard time you will be well aware that there are no magic wands. So what does help a person going through a change process?
Continue reading What helps people change?

Change is challenging

I have found this experiment very useful to explain the challenge in change:

Step 1. Cross your arms.

Step 2. Cross your arms in the opposite direction

Step 3. Reflect: Does it feel a bit uncomfortable?

For many it does! And if changing the way we cross our arms is uncomfortable, how much more so to change the way we eat, exercise, drink, smoke, talk, think…

The Transtheoretical model (Prochaska and colleagues) provides a helpful framework to conceptualize the PROCESS of change.

Continue reading Change is challenging